Wednesday, March 25, 2009

I have officially become "that person"!

I never thought it would happen, but I'm slowly realizing I've become "that person"! I'm "that person" people point out, snicker, and stare at when I'm in public. In private, I'm "that person" that I said I'd never become! Before I had kids there were so many things I vowed I'd never do, only to throw it all to the wayside after having kids!

Pre-kids I adamantly vowed I'd NEVER sniff a baby's butt! I never even thought people did it until I witnessed it with my very own eyes at the post office during my 9th month of pregnancy with Wacky Zacky. I rubbed my bulging belly smirking and thinking I'd never become "that person". Now, I must admit I do the "sniff butt check" on a regular basis, sometimes even a few times just to make sure and I've gone as far as to pass Wacky Zacky or Zany Janie to Papa Z so he can double check!

Pre-kids I didn't appropriately appreciate going to the bathroom by myself. For the past three years I have had an audience for every performance-pee/pooh/vomiting-and can probably count on one hand the number of times I've been able to go by myself.

Pre-kids I would sit wide-eyed and mouth open as I watched a mother walk around with a baby tethered to her leg. I am now that mother who has learned to balance with one wound around each leg.

Pre-kids I was grossed out by hearing stories about moms not showering on a daily basis. I now find that I need to put showering on my "To do" list or it just doesn't get done!

I have become "that person" in the stores you see pushing a double stroller with one hand while batting away sticky hands to prevent them from touching every item in the store. I am also the one you see glaring at the single slim person coming out of the handicapped bathroom when all the other stalls were open! Come on people-don't you know mother's with strollers need those bathrooms too?

I have become "that person" who hums kids songs in public without even realizing it! If I'm not humming it chances are good it's at least in my head and has been for the last 5 hours! Those tunes are catchy! Currently "The Wheels on the Bus go Round and Round" is the #1 song in my head.

Pre-kids I would gag and be on the verge of vomiting if I had to pick up a napkin or Kleenex that belonged to someone else. Now I've had every bodily fluid imaginable on me and I don't even flinch. I have also found my butt has become a convenient Kleenex for my kids as they love to wipe their nose and mouth across it instead of asking for a tissue. I've found the majority of time I am supporting a smear of something across my backside.

I have become "that person" who goes to amusement parks and doesn't ride any rides for people over 42 inches!

I have become a part of "that family" that gets all the glares when we walk into an airplane. Each passenger sits holding their breath and praying that your seats are nowhere near them!

Don't get me wrong...I'm not complaining that I've become "that person". Actually I enjoy my life and wouldn't change a thing about it-other than the snot and food smears on my butt-I could do without those...Horizontal stripes across the butt are not flattering for even the slimmest figure!

Zany thought of the day: What have you vowed you'd never do only to find yourself doing it days, months, or years later?

4 comments:

Unknown said...

I love it - so true. I relate to the bodily fluids. Before my son, I wouldn't even share a soda with my husband. One day I was picking my son's nose and I said to my husband, "I never in a million years thought I would ever pick someone else's nose". Somehow when it's your own kid, you don't care at all! - so strange! lol

Erika said...

Oh, wow, how things change when the babies come. I never thought I would be the one with the Momma butt but here i am with baggy jeans and t-shirt. I also do the butt check and have actually licked my finger to try to remove some ancient tidbit of food off their cheek! Now that is GROSS!!

AnniKae said...

This is a very cute post. Every mom out there can totally relate. Congrats to you for becoming April's Featured Seller.

Unknown said...

Amen sister!!! It was like reading my life story...kids change everything! I now have an adult son and a teenaged daughter. I chuckle when I see a mom with little ones doing the things you described and wonderful if she ever said "Never" LOL